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Author Status 4 – Writexistential Crisis

An existential crisis brought on by one’s writing.

The fear that your absolute lack of ability to get a response is actually proof that you don’t exist.

What happens when you get and use Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and a blog in order to create an author platform, but despite following all the best advice you continue to go essentially unnoticed.

Something that makes you wonder if there is a point to continuing to post or publish as it seems that not only does no one care, no one even sees it.

Also: the reason I haven’t been posting those lengthy in-depth theories and analysis on writing which it seems no one particularly cares for anyway. That and it’s the end of the tax year and I’m busy with my day job.

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Posted by on April 2, 2017 in On L.C. Morgenstern's Work

 

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Author Status !? – The Stress Don’t Stop (because you published)

I am SO sorry for not having gotten back to posting regularly (it was supposed to go back to once a week – my bad).

As you might have guessed, this last …well, almost a month now if we’re counting from the Kindle release… has been hectic. I’ve only just published for the first time and have quickly discovered that – no matter how stressed I was during the publication process – it’s actually more stressful when you think the worst is behind you and then stumble upon the fact that [BLEEP of your choice] you now have to advertise the damned thing.

And if you’re an author like me, you probably know that having to do social media enough to build up a prescence – and a buyer base – is annoying because it takes a lot of time you could be spending on your writing. If your a technologically incompetent outcast with no social life, like me, you probably also know that – to those unfamiliar with it – having to abruptly create and manage a flood of social media platforms in order to market yourself is not quite your worst nightmare (that’s the one where everyone in the world hates you because you’re an embarassment and the spiders turn up) but it’s pretty close.

The one upside is that – while I was contacting my old fanfiction fans to let them know I was taking my fics down – I got back in contact with some wonderful people who used to like my fanfiction and whose opinions on my first published work I am now terrified and anxious to know. But I also really enjoyed getting back in touch with them, which is impressive given the whole “technologically incompetent outcast with no social life” bit. One of them even gave me some truly awesome ideas for posts which I will hopefully get to just as soon as I am no longer completely run off my feet.

The upshot of all this is that I will be trying to get back to a once-a-week posting schedule …soon. That and that you can now find me on several social media platforms. Technically. I’m still learning how to use them so I can’t promise I’ll be any good at responding, but still, I will work it out eventually.

Oh, and I’ve set in motion the beginnings of a youtube channel (in which I will do video versions of some of my blog posts, other similar content, and even do readings of bits of my books… just as soon as I work out how to use the sound and video editing software I have). …There’s also technically a Patreon account and a Zazzle store (both still under construction).

Expect all of these to slowly come to life over the course of the next couple of months.

 
 

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Project Status 8 – Everybody Limbo

Sorry for the lack of articulate and clever prose this time, everyone. I’m just too tired and too stressed for my usual level of quality.

The book is out on Kindle. It WAS out on Createspace/Amazon in print, but when I tried to fix an error in the description it accidentally put it back through the review process. It’ll probably come out again in a few days. Meanwhile, I’m still waiting for Ingramspark to finish its review/pre-media process for the print book – during which time the ebook also cannot be adjusted – and then I need to fix the prices. For some reason the cover image is currently listed as not available, which is another headache. And once it’s all over I don’t even know how to find it in the estores of Ingram’s distribution partners, assuming that all books Ingram publishes do go into their distribution partner’s estores (which I’m not even sure about).

So many things have gone wrong, been delayed, et cetera, that I’m stressed up to my gills and haven’t slept properly in at least a week. (And, apparently, was too busy to notice the sudden development of gills on my person.)

I just want it to be over. But even once it is up I still have to market it and do the legal deposit and and and and… I’m in limbo. The book’s in limbo. It’s like a ridiculous dance party ducking under unexpected bars of difficulty and stomping all over my hopes. Everybody limbo!

UPDATE: Apparently no one in my family told the relatives in the UK that I’d published. That means that the whole one sale I’ve made was not, as I’d assumed, just a relative being nice. If it was one of you readers/followers who bought it: Thank you, I hope you enjoy it. If it wasn’t one of you readers/followers who bought it: That’s amazing because that would mean someone completely unaware of my existence found it and bought it. In that case, I thank you for reading my blog regardless of whether or not you care about the whole yet-another-blogger-being-crazy-enough-to-try-publishing bit.

 
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Posted by on February 26, 2017 in On L.C. Morgenstern's Work

 

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The Ascent of Hassle Mountain

When you’ve finally finished drafting your book and your editor has returned it to you all shiny and untangled, when you’ve paid them and set up your accounts on the various self-publishing platforms you are going to use, it feels like you have fought long and hard but finally, finally, almost reached the top of the great peak of Hassle Mountain and are almost standing at the top of the world – the wind is fresh and cool and you feel as if you could just reach up and touch the stars of Success in the sky above.

You take those last few steps up Hassle Mountain, by contacting a cover person and a formatter, and look up to take in the majestic sight of your finally being at the top of that mountain of complicated and confusing stuff you have to do to get published and

 

…oh, look, another mountain. That one’s called The Greater Hassle and if you look carefully you can see the triplet peaks of Bureaucracy, Confusion, and Financial Difficulties. What you can’t see is the summit. And if you call out to the camp you can see across from you to send you a line so you can zip over? Well, you’re going to be told that you’ll need to head on down to their lower camp on ISBN Point first, and for that you’re going to have to go around the Unhelpful-FAQ cliffs of Bureaucracy’s sheer face to be able to get anyone at ISBN Point to help you.

Good luck not plummeting to your own certain doom while you try to navigate that fucker. The easy part is over, the hard part just beginning. Suddenly those stars you could touch seem so very far away. Don’t forget to breath, though – remember your oxygen tank, because you will need it.

 
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Posted by on January 3, 2017 in On L.C. Morgenstern's Work

 

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Project Status 5 – Cash Strapped and Exasperated

I don’t have the money to get my manuscript – which is WRITING ADVICE – professionally copyedited.

Oh, make no mistake; I’ve had people look over it, but no professional copyeditors. The main edit was content editing and the main person I’ve had to edit it is a second language English speaker – although she’s been speaking the language longer than I’ve been alive. Still…

This whole experience has made me realise not only how complicated publishing is (what the heck is trim size, anyway?) but also how expensive it is. And how the deck is – due to the nature of the beast – stacked against those who simply cannot afford to spend c. 1k on a professional editor, or cover design, or marketing, or formatting (which can easily get up to 3k total!). I mean, even the “cheap” rates of the major publishing platforms like Smashwords and Amazon’s Createspace and Kindle are still ultimately very expensive for anyone who doesn’t have that much, or any, money to spare. And then, of course, books which are not professionally edited, covered, etc, don’t do as well on the market or – worse – give the author a bad reputation. But if I wait to have the money to spare I’ll never get published.

I totally understand why these things are expensive – I mean, my own sibling is an editor and is struggling to find work (and won’t even give me a discount, despite knowing I’m the poorer of the two of us). And the jobs do take a lot of skill and effort.

But it’s frustrating. So is the whole system of formatting, etc, for self publishing sites. Could someone please assume I’m an idiot and explain it in a click this, click that way so I don’t have to get confused by all the options?

I’m still hoping to get this book out before the end of October. All (sure, “all”; like it’s not a huge bleeping mountain of confusing) I have left to do is make the accounts on the necessary websites, format the work, make a cover, and, um… have I missed anything?

Oh why do I even bother asking? It’s not like people understand that there’s a difference between hitting a like button and actually interacting, anymore. I hate like buttons. I have nobody to talk to and the walls can’t hold up a decent conversation. The ceiling’s all high and mighty and the floor’s all down and trodden.

 
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Posted by on October 19, 2016 in On L.C. Morgenstern's Work

 

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